Sunday night—time when I was on my bed and I feel like being burned and some needles and pins are sticking all over my body. High fever yes, disturbing? Well, I’m not sure. But since then I don’t know what happened to my body—some series of things that I do not understand and it would be too much of information if I enumerate them. Now, still having the same question mark on my face about my physical condition, I deemed the fact that this is due to some other things that happened in the past. In this blog entry, I will try to conceptualize some theories why my body is in state of rebellion.
First and foremost, if I remember it correctly, we defined “Theory” in fourth grade as a “wild guess”. Oh wait. I think I’m talking about hypothesis! Lol. Wait, lemme think. Theory is a thoughtful and rational explanation of the general nature of things (by Wikipedia) but to my blog, let’s just define theory as a wild guess. ‘Kay? Haha!
Theory 1: Series of unfortunate events taking its toll on me.
For the couple of weeks now, I’ve been facing some series of events that well, I feel like brings too much stress and pressure on me. And if you have known me since second grade (like Jers), you would know my stress/pressure tolerance is weak. Yes, you read it right. Every time before an exam in my whole student life I would be sick out of the blue! That is how weak my stress level is!
And so, maybe, I think all these things has made my stress level up and made me feel like in a pressure cooker that’s why my body just broke down. My recent first ever break up, my work that I want to leave but just don’t want to let me go, my family problems, my messed-up meetings during weekend. Everything has been stressful.
Theory 2: A Secret Mission
Since I was diagnosed of Typhoid last 2008, I rarely did lied. It may sound ideal but yes. I realized that moment that whenever I lie, something bad happens to me afterward and it feels odd, actually. And so since then, I am so scared of lying. But recently, I did some “secret mission trip” somewhere (My closest friends knows this) and I got to think about the situation and feel like this is one of the reasons why my body’s irritating lately. Well, call me shallow but this is what I feel.
Theory 3: No rest days
Are you kidding me? 5 times in a week, I am in the office from 7:30 (approximately) until 6:30 (approximately), during Saturdays, I have a meeting with CDN at 7am, 10am we have a training, After lunch at 2 onwards, I have a cell meeting and at home, I will do the line-up and some powerpoint presentation for Sunday. During Sundays, wake up at 5:30am and at church at 6:30am. Sunday service at 7:30am until 12nn (approximately) and after it, some finance meeting and other meetings. During 3rd Sunday, we have a youth service at 3pm and some other times, we have seminars at 1pm. Excluded here are extra activities like the trip to Caliraya last Sunday, some time with my friends and boyfriend.
And so, I think I am the “Kuratcha” Ang babaeng walang pahinga (the girl without rest). Hahahaha! Not that I am complaining! No, I am not! But if you will just look at my schedule, you’ll realize how God has been giving me strength!
Theory 4: I don’t see my doctor.
Why? I’m scared! Because I have a phobia seeing the doctor and I don’t want to know what is wrong with my semi-fat body! I. don’t. want. To. Know.
And so here I am. Typing this word, coughing and feeling really dizzy right now. I don’t know what’s wrong with me or if I can take it anymore. But I am sure that I will be fine. I know and I believe that I will be just fine. 🙂